Have you ever been in a situation that you felt was hopeless, and you had already given up on it turning around? More than that, were you so scared and angry that you didn't want it to turn around? Yea, me too..... then God intervened.
Rewind to December, 2006....Our wedding day was nothing short of interesting. You may already know the story but in case you don't here's a quick recap. Isaac was rushed to the ER the morning of our wedding with intense back pain, vomiting, and passing out. After some tests were ran, it was determined that it was a kidney stone causing his discomfort. A bag of fluid and some pain medicine and he was on his way to the church. He told me that the day would go as planned. Easy for him to say. I cried and felt sorry for myself, this was supposed to be MY day. Dang it. Well, we said our vows, spent the bare minimum amount of time at the reception and were on our way to our hotel. I think you can probably imagine what the photos from that day look like: not pretty. So, four hard years later we decided it was time for some new pictures... and a new wedding day story.
I've been thinking about this post since Isaac and I scheduled our "renewal of vows" photo shoot with Lauren. I feel like I have something to prove to the world, something important to say. Well, here it is- we serve a God that can do things beyond your wildest dreams! In my opinion far too many people humanize God and limit His abilities. Many of you know the struggles Isaac and I have had, too many of you actually. I'm here to apologize for that. Those struggles were broadcasted way too publicly and it's one of the biggest regrets of my life. We've lost friends since then, and I'm pretty sure we've both lost a lot of respect for completely different reasons. Others have judged us to the core. But that's not where the story ends. Our love today is stronger than it ever has been, thanks to our amazing and faithful God. During that time, my body felt as if it could not withhold the weight of my heart. My heart was heavier than an elephant and I prayed I would not feel that way forever. I heard God whispering four tiny words the whole time, "don't give up yet." As time went by I began to feel lighter, until all I could do was praise Him and thank Him. I knew better things were coming my way. I kept hearing it though, it was deafening and resonating in my soul. Not long after that, it happened. My heart stirred and my soul ached for the man that has always stolen my breath away, but was it loneliness or memories of what was? No, I can confidently say God had intervened. As much as logic and pride protested, I gave up and gave in to God. And that's when Isaac and I came together in the way God originally intended. Since then, things have been less than perfect, as any marriage. But I can say honestly today that I would not change my decision. My husband is amazing, more amazing than even I imagined him to be. He is constantly in search of a deeper relationship with Jesus, leading our spiritual life, and being the husband and father I've dreamed of. Is he perfect? No. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone sins- that's why Jesus died on the cross for each and every one of us. But he's all mine, until death do us part. Perseverance is a trait I wish every marriage had, but it comes straight from God, in our case anyway.
Isaac's and my prayer is that God will always intervene, that we'll always persevere, and that He'll continue to lead us down this path toward being more like Him. Thanks for reading friends, these are the deepest of deep feelings from my heart.
BUT, this is the most amazing part- the photos! Lauren was incredible to work with. She helped bring my vision to life. We will be eternally grateful for these photos and the emotions captured. Lauren, never stop living this dream, you are amazing my friend.
The most important, emotional, and memorable part of the whole evening was when we read handwritten vows to one another. This is why we needed to do this. Not only for exceptional photos, but to renew the commitment we made to each other almost 4 years ago.